


Tiny Ugly Couch

by Polluxander



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Fanart, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-20
Updated: 2013-12-20
Packaged: 2018-01-05 07:44:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 261
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1091362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Polluxander/pseuds/Polluxander
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After putting the new sticker on his DS Dave is no longer allowed to challenge children on the bus to pokemon battles.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tiny Ugly Couch

**Author's Note:**

  * For [heirbubbles](https://archiveofourown.org/users/heirbubbles/gifts).



"You're doing it again."

"Am not." John's tongue had encompassed his entire top lip and was well on its way to touching his nose, his head cocked and DS tilted while his thumb rapid-tapped the B button as if any of those things had any sway on whether or not he caught a pokemon. So he was, indeed, 'doing it'.

"You are doing it so hard that in this very moment I have become pregnant with your hairy bucktoothed offspring and each of them will pop out of me with that exact same expression. You've ruined our children John, I hope you're happy with yourself."

"Immensely." At least he put the dumb look away for now, though that didn't exactly promise Dave a life free of silly faces courtesy of one John Egbert. John was the self-proclaimed grand puba of absurd expressions, an escaped experiment form a local lab to discover if one's face really did 'stick that way' as every mother who ever lived and ever would live seemed to believe. His roommate was a five year old.

"Quit being a pain in the ass and accept my trade."

"Sure thing babydoll. Don't forget to trade me a haunter."

"Whatever you want, sugartits."

Most Sundays went more or less like this, sat on their rescued alley couch, lazy shooting insults back and forth between the two of them while they played games or watching a movie that Dave spent the entire time talking over.

"Oh my god, you assmunch! You gave it an everstone!"

Who could really ask for more?

**Author's Note:**

> Some alternate versions of the pic
> 
>  


End file.
